Journey to God

De Simple Silence.

[modifier] Khilnanis Rechristened Double Beans !

God in Humor Form!

I had already mentioned earlier that I was confused about Baba's Godhood when he asked us mundane things and did not lecture about spirituality. I realized Meher Baba was very different from all the holy men, spiritual masters and swamijis I had met before. I always thought God to be serious business. With Meher Baba life was anything but serious. Coming in contact with Baba we realized that God was not just serious but He can be friendly and humorous as well. He was like a true friend and we treasured His friendship with us. We were fortunate to live in the time when God was amongst us and spoke to us. Baba's humor is now legendary with most Baba lovers. But for those who have just joined the journey to God let me tell you are simultaneously joining the Laughter Club. Humor could be at your expense or anyone else's but don't forget ever that as much as you can amuse God don't ever try to make fun of Him. My experiences of amusing incidences are plenty. Here's one that I can't resist narrating.

During the days we spent in Guruprasad, Baba played cards with Prem and many others. On the days we were to spend the full day with Baba we were invariably late in arriving at Guruprasad. I had to get up early, cook the food, get the children ready, and clean the house before leaving. This heavy-duty chore I did single-handedly and it was time-consuming. It was but natural that we got late. Baba always asked us why we got late always. And conveniently Prem used to look at me to give the explanation. And Baba used to tell us to come early next time. If I said that it took time for me to cook, Baba used to ask, "What is it that you have cooked that has made you late?" He always used to inquire!

One day when we were late and Baba asked me what I cooked I replied that I had made double beans. Actually double beans were easy to cook. One had to boil them and cook them. It was the best dish to cook for times when there were no vegetables at home. Moreover everyone in the family loved eating them. It was very surprising that only on the day I cooked double beans that Baba used to ask what I had cooked. On other days He hardly asked. I thought He was always up to some mischief the day I was making double beans.

Gradually Baba started calling us double beans! And everyone teased us by that name and along with everyone Baba also laughed. I decided that I would not take double beans to Guruprasad. Everyday I made new dishes and went to meet Baba. I felt happy within and wondered when Baba would ask me what I had cooked and soon He would stop calling us double beans. But to my surprise Baba never asked me once what I had brought for lunch. But others were still calling us double beans.

I thought now that Baba does not ask anymore about what I cook, I decided to take double beans thinking He would not even know about it. And there are no surprises here to guess — Baba asked me that very day, "What have you for lunch?" I was totally embarrassed and said, "Double beans." Almost everyone laughed. I had to accept defeat. But this time I joined in the laughter as my ego crumbled and all of us doubled up our laughter!

This may have been hilarious as we look back in time. But this incident left a deep impact on my mind for the rest of my life. We realized that even in the smallest things, Baba proves to us subtly that He is the Almighty and we cannot take Him lightly. What a beautiful way to teach us a lesson — despite the fact He keeps telling us, "I have come not to teach but to awaken," nothing is hidden from His sharp and loving gaze. He came amidst us in human form and behaved every inch a human. He took pains to free humanity from misery and bondage.

[modifier] My Early Years

A child is a piece of Divinity clothed in flesh. (From Prem's [Girja's husband] collection of quotes)

The grainy sands of time are etched out hazily in my memory. It belongs to an era gone by more than half a century ago. Before I actually met Meher Baba, my life revolved around 'God-The Invisible One'. I was always shown the path to God by my parents. Even later in life, whichever way I went, my path turned only towards God. As we go back in timeline, an early life sketch will help to understand my journey better.

I was born on 23rd August, 1926, in Pisheen, a few miles away from the port city of Karachi, in undivided India, one year after Avatar Meher Baba started to keep His Silence. I was completely ignorant about the fact that God was already amongst us in human form. Our family led a very religious life. I was one of the eight siblings of my father P V Karamchandani, a doctor in the British Indian military force. Father's job was transferable. We traveled along, packing our bags wherever he was posted in India. Only on a few occasions he was posted in non family stations and we missed him. During this period, in my early childhood, we shifted to our ancestral home in Dadu, another farming district, towards Northwest of Karachi. Dadu was and still is the main link to the famed cradle of Ancient Civilization at Indus Valley. Today a super highway from Karachi leads one to the 5000 year old city of Mahenjo Daro. Although my father practiced medicine, he was equally interested in spirituality. He was a perfect example of a spiritual mind in a spiritual body. Probably it was my grandfather's quest for God that made my father the way he was (and obviously it percolated down to me as well).

My earliest memory is of the time when I was aged three or four years. At the crack of dawn, we used to wake up to the devout strains of the Gurbani text being recited at home. Prayers were a daily ritual which preoccupied the family from 5 am every morning. In the evenings we did the Namjap (name recitation) too. We had a family Guru, Swami Dharamdas, like most Hindu families then. For us, the sacred Granth Saheb was a religious text, from which we imbibed our religious knowledge and moral code of conduct. Our Guru also used to come home to give discourses in Gurumukhi, values of spiritual and worldly life. That was the life we were accustomed to and accepted it naturally. I remember listening to holy stories and folk tales from my parents during these peaceful times. My young mind was too immature to distinguish between a Swamiji or a spiritual teacher or even God for that matter. I was so much inspired by religious stories that I was not interested in material things. I wondered what God was like? If God existed, where was He? I was curious to know if He was anywhere around us! Although my father was a spiritualist he was also idealistic. He wanted all of us to value our human life and have good morals and lead lives of householders. And it was this quaint, simple quality of his that I admired most. He was most practical. My father was a pure soul and my respect for him is eternal. He put me through education to become worldly wise.

Unlike my father my mother was a sacrificing soul. She was very religious and like all mothers had a huge heart! For her, 'giving' and 'sacrificing' were very important in life. She suffered a lot physically but had great faith in God's power to redeem. I usually stayed at home with her for company, while my other brothers and sisters led busy lives working outside the home. Since my mother was frequently getting arthritic attacks, I was around to support her. On some days I also sacrificed my studies which she appreciated silently. This sacrifice of skipping studies meant a lot for her. She expressed her happiness through her kind eyes. In my young years this sacrifice taught me a valuable lesson. There is so much happiness in sacrificing for others and deriving satisfaction. My mother expired at the age of 53 fulfilling her life of sacrifice.

As I grew, my love for God also grew. I wanted to know more about Him. I was in deep turmoil. As a child I went to a convent school and was taught that Jesus is God who came in Human Form. This fact stuck in my head perhaps very early in life. I genuinely felt, 'if God is there in Human Form, I want to see him.' I must have been barely nine or ten years old when the longing to meet God in this lifetime got the better of me. I decided to write a letter to God Wherever He was! As a child, I thought if I wrote to Him, He would certainly help me and answer all my questions. So there, quietly, I took out a pencil and paper and wrote...

Dear God,

If you are there in this world, I want to meet you! I want to see you in a physical form and hope you will answer my prayer!

Your child, Girja

I wrote this letter and put it in an envelope and wrote the address and posted it!

To, God, In Heaven.

In that age of innocence, I soon forgot about this postal disaster! I don't recall telling this to anyone in the family. I don't even remember waiting for a reply either. But my search continued... blissfully.

Smt. Girjadevi P. Khilnani. © 2006 N. A. Nagpal